At the core of all intimacy work is the gentle and efficient dismantling of manipulation. When our reality is not manipulated, it effortlessly reveals itself exactly as it is - as an expression of the vibrational - and not as it is currently portrayed to be. All portrayed appearances then dissolve into actuality and pretence into Presence.
It is only possible to perceive the multi-dimensional parameters of our ongoing manipulative behavior upon the outer world - and the dire impact this intent has upon the quantity and quality of our life experience - when we are able to experientially observe this unfolding within the way we behave toward ourselves.
It is our awareness of this manipulative approach toward life that empowers us to integrate - and so heal - this predicament.
'Awareness' and 'intent' are the only tools of transformation we require to accomplish this task.
Whenever we place our awareness upon something - it begins to move - and it moves according to the dimensions of our intent in that specific moment.
It is therefore necessary to bring our awareness into the mechanics of our ongoing intent to manipulate - to examine how manipulation comes about - and through this to perceive clearly what consequence this behavior has within the relationships between the emotional, mental, and physical attributes that represent the expression of the vibrational called, 'our human experience'.
Again - a experiential comprehension of The Pathway Of Awareness and The Seven Year Cycle within the unfolding of our own life experience serve to facilitate this awareness.
[From this point onwards, I am making entries on this blog site from the point of view that you have already taken the time to read THE PRESENCE PROCESS and/or ALCHEMY OF THE HEART, and that you have explored the wide range of free materials available on the website [ http://www.thepresenceportal.com/ ], and are therefore familiar with these two foundational aspects of this work.
If you have not, I suggest you do so, as the comprehension of the movement of our awareness from the vibrational, through the emotional, then mental, and into the physical as we enter and manifest our human experience - and, the movement of our awareness from the physical, through the mental, then the emotional, and into the vibrational as we reawaken into an experiential encounter with 'what is' - are crucial throughout all our intimate explorations.
I have taken the time to explain these on many occasions and through the many formats on the website's facilities - free audios, available CD's, free down loadable writings, DVD's, etc. Accordingly, I am not going to repeat this explanation in great detail beyond that which is required to explain what we are specifically dealing with in any given moment.
However, I will say this: If you do not yet have the experiential comprehension of The Pathway Of Awareness and The Seven Year Cycle as a basic foundation - the essence of the intent to explore intimacy - and the profound revelations and insights unfolding from such a journey - will go right over your head, as opposed to efficiently penetrating your heart. Enough said.]
Manipulation is essentially a manifestation of behavioral patterns arising out of our condition of imprinted emotional discomfort. As we move through our childhood experience, we function from a point of view of extreme felt-perception. We are like thirsty sponges drinking in experience primarily through our feeling capacity. Accordingly, every experience we move through saturates our emotional condition with felt-patterns [programs].
After seven years of childhood, we then enter schooling - the mental aspect of our development - and then at around 14 and our physiological shift called 'puberty' - we again refocus our awareness by placing it increasingly upon the physical aspect of our life experience.
By the time we are what we call, 'an adult', the outer physical world matters to us more than anything else. Consequently, we relate to the material world as if it is the causal point of the quality of all our human experiences. Our subsequent behavior whenever we are uncomfortable reveals the presence of this perceptual error:
Whenever we are uncomfortable we interact with our physical experiences mentally - by thinking about them, by telling stories about them, and by generally relating to them through our 'understanding'.
By the time we encapsulate this adult, physical/mental point of view - the emotional aspect of our experience becomes a back-seat driver. "Shut up back there, can't you see I'M driving." We are aware we have emotions - however, we do not regard this aspect of our experience as relevant when attempting to impact the quality of it. It is our drive - but we do not let it drive.
Generally, habitually, when we attempt to change the quality of our experience - we first observe the physical aspect of it - relate to this physical predicament mentally by telling stories - and then reactively interact with it physically and mentally through the justifications of these stories.
Yet, at the core of the quality of any experience we seek to adjust is 'a feeling'. We only seek to adjust something because of the feeling related to it is impacting us in a way we perceive as uncomfortable. However, as an adult, we do not real eyes this. We assume it is our physical circumstances or our mental functioning that is at fault.
By the time we are adults - because our capacity for felt-perception is numbed almost to the point of paralysis - it is very challenging for us to real eyes it is our imprinted emotional condition - and the uncomfortable felt-aspects radiating from within this - which is causal to any quality of our human experience we call 'uncomfortable'.
By the time we are adults, the role of the emotional attribute within our human experience is for the most part invisible - unnecessary - and, discounted as inconsequential.
We declare, "I really feel bad about this." Yet, when it comes to impacting the predicament we are referring to, we do not attempt to approach our experience of it through the parameters of felt-perception -through our perceptual conduit of 'feeling'. Instead, we attempt to impact it mentally - by thinking about it - and physically - by rearranging the physical circumstances reflecting it.
No matter how bad we feel - we still ignore feeling. Feeling is our blind spot.
Yet, it is our relationship with 'feeling' that is pivotal to comprehending the cause of all manipulation behavior.
Manipulation is a two-fisted-punch through we we continually batter ourselves and our world. The behavior we call 'manipulation' - and 'our complete lack of awareness of the role of felt-perception within the quality of our human experience' - are joined at the hip.
THE MANIPULATIVE TWO-FISTED PUNCH...
The first blow is the punch we deliver in an attempt to sedate and control any awareness of our authentic emotional predicament. [BAM! OUCH!]
By the time we are adults, we are masters at this. We have developed many behaviors whose only purpose is to distract us from our inner, imprinted, felt-discomfort. We use anything from food to work to sex to drugs to alcohol to pharmaceuticals to TV to accomplish this.
The moment this discomfort arises within our awareness, we reactively do something. Whatever it is we do is based upon the mental story we tell about our arising discomfort. The moment we believe the story we tell about it - we act upon it. The story is never true.
Because our felt-perception is so crippled - even though we are feeling bad - this mental story arises not out of emotional body awareness - but is instead is driven by how this inner emotional condition is being reflected back to us upon the mirror of our outer physical experience.
We think about what to do ,and then act upon these thoughts. Unconsciously, the intent driving this looped mental/physical behavior is the ridding our awareness of the emotionally imprinted discomfort underlying the experience we being faced with.
This sedation and control of what is really happening within us is the first punch we deliver.
We then immediately deliver another blow:
This second follow-up blow is usually the knockout that keeps us dumbed-down of having any experience of 'what is'. This second punch is represented by our attempt to then forcibly incorporate into our experience the feeling we would rather be having. [BAM! OUCH!]
Again, to accomplish this forced input of felt-experience regarded as preferable - we may use anything from food to work to sex to drugs to alcohol to pharmaceuticals to TV. It doesn't matter - whatever works to assist us to feel better is what we do. We think about it - then we do it. Often we just do it.
So, the first punch is to stun ourselves of any felt-awareness of our imprinted emotional condition - and the second punch, the knockout blow - is to overlay this arising imprinted felt-discomfort with a felt-experience we would rather be having.
In delivering these two blows, we render ourselves completely unconscious to 'what is'. Presence transforms into pretence. Actuality becomes 'a portrayed appearance'. There is no longer any authenticity, integrity - and definitely no possibility of intimacy.
All vulnerability to 'what is' is obliterated.
This ongoing, addictive manipulation, is the ganging up of the physical and mental aspect of our awareness upon the emotional. It is the emotional body that is consistently being battered by these two punches. We refuse to listen to it - and we simultaneously physically impose our well thought-out plans and agendas upon it.
We don't care what it has to say [through its dialogue of felt-perception]. We do not care about how it really feels. We only care about physically and mentally twisting and distorting it to accomplish a feeling we want according to what we think we are supposed to be feeling.
As an adult, until we bring these mechanics of manipulation into our experiential awareness [bullying], we are doing this within and to ourselves 24 hours a day. Even our dream states reflect this unceasing manipulative activity.
Manipulation is our every attempt to feel better - as opposed to getting better at feeling.
Accordingly, the emotional body becomes a whore, a prostitute, whose only purpose is to "shut up!", and when speaking - to only do so in a language decided upon as appropriate by the mental, and provided by the physical.
The consequence is that there is zero awareness within us of that actuality of the vibrational. We cannot authentically feel what peace or love is. We cannot authentically feel what we are or what God is for us. We only perceive distorted forms of these vibrations, which we then relate to as fear, anger, and grief.
Consequently, we are blind to the awareness that the experiential portal into the vibrational - through which its attributes manifest within our mental and physical expressions - and through which we return into a full awareness of it while in human form - is the emotional.
The emotional is 'the door'. Yet, we unconsciously and reactively build an entire life experience founded upon slamming this door closed, and in place of it, out of our thinking and doing, we manufacture artificial doors we believe have the capacity to deliver us into an authentic awareness of the vibrational.
These artificial doors we then call 'our spirituality', or 'metaphysics', and 'religion'.
Yet, without acknowledgement of the emotional body as the causal entry point into experiential vibrational awareness - these manufactured doors open only into illusionary pathways leading forever nowhere. Our 'hells' are simply experiences in which The Presence of The Vibrational is perceptually masked from our awareness - a predicament manifest entirely of our own thinking and doing.
What the heart reveals to me through the experiential application of alchemy is simple yet profound:
Until I am able to experientially perceive this predicament of ongoing manipulation within myself - I am blind to the actuality that the community upon this entire planet is reeling 24 hours a day from the consequences of this behavioral dysfunction. [BAM-BAM OUCH! BAM-BAM OUCH! BAM-BAM OUCH! BAM-BAM OUCH! BAM-BAM OUCH! BAM-BAM OUCH! BAM-BAM OUCH! Ad infinitum... ]
And, until I experientially enter the alchemical procedures empowering me to realign this energetic flow so that my behavior honors The Pathway Of Awareness -I actually believe I can rectify this predicament by thinking about it - and then by fiddling with the physical aspects of my outer world experience. And, while I conduct myself this way, I am lost: I am cleaning the mirror in an attempt to heal the pimples on my face.
Exploring intimacy with and within myself commences in the exact moment I bow to my emotional body as the current causal point of the quality of my human experience.
Exploring intimacy with and within myself commences in the exact moment I commit to feeling what it is I am really feeling.
Exploring intimacy with and within myself commences in the exact moment I stop attempting to mask what I am really feeling with feelings I would rather be having.
Until this step into alchemy is consciously and experientially entered - the step into being with what is without condition - no authenticity or integrity or intimacy is possible.
Intimacy commences the moment I commit to cease the behavior of knocking myself out - and instead make a commitment to consciously commence knocking upon the door of what is truly unfolding within me.