As we explore further aspects of intimacy we shall move more deeply into aspects of what we have discussed here. But for now – this piece of writing encapsulates all the instructions we require to initiate a deepening of this journey in a responsible, compassionate, and fruitful manner. There is however one more useful perceptual tool to share which adds a deeply compassionate vibrational resonance to our shared moments of emotional processing. This is called, ‘The Bridge’.
In revealing this perceptual tool, we bring our discussion on the practice of gazing full circle, right back to where we commenced it: To the conscious establishment of clear intent when consciously exploring intimacy with another.
As has been stated repeatedly throughout this NAKED journey – there is a radiance moved through in this heart-work – that when honored – facilitates our exploration into and through the resonance of intimacy: First we encounter and consciously commence the art of resolving emotional signatures reflected within our experience when alone, then we consciously commence resolving emotional signatures as reflected back to us through our birth family, and only then do we consciously initiate such a journey with a companion.
There is method in the deliberateness of this radiance. A crucial part of this is that we are to experientially establish an awareness of the divine aspect of ourselves which we call ‘the vibrational’ – and this awareness is to be established experientially to some extent before we commence such a journey with another.
There is no formulae, no guaranteed step-by-step instruction that I know of, on how to establish this experiential awareness of our vibrational divinity as a certainty - other than our willingness to first process the emotional signatures within our experience that come up when we are alone, and then to commence this processing through the reflections revealed to us through our current way of relating to our birth family. Emotional processing does not ‘make this vibrational experience happen’ – it simply serves to unmask what is already and always present.
In THE PRESENCE PROCESS we refer to this achievement of experiential vibrational awareness as ‘gaining an awareness of our Inner Presence’. Our Inner Presence is an expression within this world experience of our vibrational actuality. We come to ‘know it’ through emotional processing. We come to ‘know it’ through the continual falling away of what it is masking its continuous presence. It is an awareness which visits us in a way that is customized to our personal perceptual capacities. Achieving it occurs ‘through us’ and is therefore not something another can ‘do to us’. It is 'a knowing' beyond any reasoning or any specific emotional, mental, and physical validation.
Once we have accomplished a certain amount of emotional processing, we real eyes there is a part of our experience that always is, always has been, and always will be. We ‘feel this to be so’, and so we real eyes this through the gradual development of our felt-perception. This is not something we can prove to another or even communicate efficiently through the vehicle of ‘understanding’. It arises only when we are ready to contain it – only when it is required. Once we know it, we know it. Our awareness of it does not require validation by another.
If we are not yet aware of this aspect of ourselves – no amount of trying or discussing or asking questions or reading or listening to others achieves it. It is achieved experientially through removing the masking of it. It is our emotional imprinting which masks it. It is therefore achieved through the consistent and continual willingness ‘to consciously participate in processing what is not actual’ – our emotional imprinting and the consequent mental and physical projections arising from within these dysfunctional energetic patterns.
What is valid in this discussion is this: If we are not yet to some extent experientially aware of this divine aspect of ourselves – of this part of us which is permanent, unchanging, and therefore eternal – then we are not yet ready to enter a conscious exploration of intimacy with another.
This is because if we do not yet have this aspect of ourselves in which to take refuge – then when the shared upsets that explode from a practice like gazing arise – we immediately, reflexively, run from what is unfolding. Translated, it means we attempt to cage, kill, or flee the triggered experience we are having with our companion. This is what ‘breaking up’ is. It is ‘the fleeing of a triggered emotional signature’. If all we know of our current human experience is the emotional, mental, and physical aspect of it – then, when these deeply primal signatures arise and impact our emotional, mental, and physical parameters – we have nowhere from which to compassionately observe their unfolding. They become all-encompassing and overwhelming.
Within the context of exploring intimacy consciously with another we require an experiential knowing of our vibrational divinity. This does not mean we have achieved enlightenment, or any such claim. It simply means we are to some extent familiar with an aspect of our unfolding experience that is unchanging. This vibrational aspect within ourselves we then refer to as, ‘The Bridge’. The Bridge is a place of beingness that is deeply connected to, yet also above and beyond, the waters of our ever-changing and flowing human life experience. It remains untouched by anything emotional, mental, and physical that transpires as a consequence of our conscious exploration into intimacy with another.
This too is why ‘we cannot find an intimacy companion’. How do we know when another has already established this Bridge-awareness within themselves? We don’t. Only the universe knows who has accomplished this experientially and is therefore for ready to face what must be faced by any two seeking to gather authentically and intimately in the name of love.
Therefore, once a suitable companion has been placed before us, and once we have approach them verbally with an invitation to explore intimacy, it is then imperative that we also verbally establish a mutual awareness of The Bridge factor within our intended exploration with each other. It may be explained from one to another in this manner:
“This exploration into intimacy we are intending is going to uproot very deeply embedded emotional signatures related to the way the feminine and masculine are interacting with each other within ourselves. There is deep hurt within these age-old ways of relating that are going to arise and be consciously felt by us both. When we gaze together, these ancient energetic patterns are going to stir and eventually arise into our awareness as uncomfortable upsets unfolding between us. This is going to feel horrible at times – so horrible that we may feel compelled to run from each other. We therefore require ‘a place of beingness’ that we may enter within ourselves so we may continue to have the capacity to participate in this processing work without destroying the fabric of our companionship. Let’s call this place of beingness, ‘The Bridge’. When something explodes unexpectedly between us it is not the end of the world, or the end of us being together. However, it may temporarily be impossible for us to interact with each other emotionally, mentally, and physically in ‘a loving, conscious, or compassionate manner’. This is okay. This is going to happen. It is a required part of this journey we are agreeing to undertake together. When these upsets arise, the worst action we can possibly initiate is to talk about it – or to act out physically what we are feeling - like getting up and leaving. These imprinted emotional conditions arising because of our gazing practice may be so explosive that they immediately knock us into deep unconsciousness. The nature of the divine guidance accompanying this work is that when this happens one of us will be conscious enough to know that this is an event triggered by our gazing – or even simply triggered by our sincere intent to explore intimacy consciously with each other. Whoever retains this capacity of awareness is to say to the other, ‘See you on The Bridge’. By one of us saying this to each other, what we are really saying is this: This is okay. Yes, it feels horrible right now, but it will come to pass if we apply the silence, stillness, and felt-resonance of alchemical beingness to it. This is supposed to happen to us. Interacting with each other emotionally, mentally, and physically right now is futile. Even though we are together as this is happening, all the work right now must be inwardly directed. We must be in it as it is and not panic. Know that despite how this arising emotional signature is currently coloring our entire reality that I still and shall always love you. For now though, I am standing on The Bridge where nothing of this earth life changes the love between us. For now I meet you there until this is resolved within me. Once resolution arises, and we are able to laugh about it, which we shall, we may return to our emotional, mental, and physical interactions with each other. Don’t be afraid of losing me, and don’t run away from this experience, or from me. These turbulent waters shall flow beneath our Bridge and our love for each other shall remain. After this is passed, we shall have enhanced our capacity to be with each other just as we are. This is all required. Meet you on The Bridge my love.”
If we do not establish The Bridge within our way of relating with our companion when consciously exploring intimacy with each other – we shall not make it through what is to be experienced upon such a journey. If we cannot verbally establish this Bridging capacity with another – our way of relating with them is not yet mature enough to enter such an experience.
An incapacity to establish and apply a perceptual tool like The Bridge is a direct consequence of not yet having done enough emotional processing of what is reflected back to us by our experience when we are alone, and it is a direct consequence of not yet having done enough emotional processing of what is reflected back to us when we sit around the dinner table with our birth family.